theshuttingofthefrenchwindowshadmadetheroomstuffyandtheturningofthevenetianblindshadmadeitdim.therewasanacridsmellontheairandtherewastooheavyasilence.itwasnotmorethansixteenfeetfromthedoortothecouchandididn’tneedmorethanhalfofthattoknowadeadmanlayonthatcouch.

hewasonhissidewithhisfacetothebackofthecouch,onearmcrookedunderhimandtheforearmoftheotherlyingalmostacrosshiseyes.betweenhischestandthebackofthecouchtherewasapoolofbloodandinthatpoollaythewebleyhammerless.thesideofhisfacewasasmearedmask.

ibentoverhim,peeringattheedgeofthewideopeneye,thebareandgaudyarm,attheinnercurveofwhichicouldseethepuffedandblackenedholeinhisheadfromwhichthebloodoozedstill.

ilefthimlikethat.hiswristwaswarmbuttherewasnodoubthewasquitedead.ilookedaroundforsomekindofnoteorscribble.therewasnothingbutthepileofscriptonthedesk.theydon’talwaysleavenotes.thetypewriterwasuncoveredonitsstand.therewasnothinginthat.otherwiseeverythinglookednaturalenough.suicidespreparethemselvesinallsortsofways,somewithliquor,somewithelaboratechampagnedinners.someineveningclothes,someinnoclothes.peoplehavekilledthemselvesonthetopsofwalls,inditches,inbathrooms,inthewater,overthewater,onthewater.theyhavehangedthemselvesinbarsandgassedthemselvesingarages.thisonelookedsimple.ihadn’theardtheshotbutitmusthavegoneoffwheniwasdownbythelakewatchingthesurfboardridermakehisturn.therewasplentyofnoise.whythatshouldhavematteredtorogerwadeididn’tknow.perhapsithadn’t.thefinalimpulsehadcoincidedwiththerunofthespeedboat.ididn’tlikeit,butnobodycaredwhatiliked.

thetornpiecesofthecheckwerestillonthefloorbutileftthem.thetornstripsofthatstuffhehadwrittenthatothernightwereinthewastebasket.theseididnotleave.ipickedthemoutandmadesureihadthemallandstuffedthemintomypocket.thebasketwasalmostempty,whichmadeiteasy.nousewonderingwherethegunhadbeen.thereweretoomanyplacestohideitin.itcouldhavebeeninachairorinthecouch,underoneofthecushions.itcouldhavebeenonthefloor,behindthebooks,anywhere.

iwentoutandshutthedoor.ilistened.fromthekitchen,sounds.iwentoutthere.eileenhadablueaprononandthekettlewasjustbeginningtowhistle.sheturnedtheflamedownandgavemeabriefimpersonalglance.

“howdoyoulikeyourtea,mr.marlowe?”

“justoutofthepotasitcomes.”

ileanedagainstthewallandgotacigaretteoutjusttohavesomethingtodowithmyfingers.ipinchedandsqueezeditandbrokeitinhalfandthrewonehalfonthefloor.hereyesfolloweditdown.ibentandpickeditup.isqueezedthetwohalvestogetherintoalittleball.

shemadethetea.“ialwaystakecreamandsugar,”shesaidoverhershoulder.“strange,whenidrinkmycoffeeblack.ilearnedteadrinkinginengland.theywereusingsaccharininsteadofsugar.whenthewarcametheyhadnocream,ofcourse.”

“youlivedinengland?”

“iworkedthere.istayedallthroughtheblitz.imetaman—butitoldyouaboutthat.”

“wheredidyoumeetroger?”

“innewyork.”

“marriedthere?”

sheswungaround,frowning.“no,wewerenotmarriedinnewyork.why?”

“justtalkingwhiletheteadraws.”

shelookedoutofthewindowoverthesink.shecouldseedowntothelakefromthere.sheleanedagainsttheedgeofthedrainboardandherfingersfiddledwithafoldedteatowel.

“ithastobestopped,”shesaid,“andidon’tknowhow.perhapshe’llhavetobecommittedtoaninstitution.somehowican’tquiteseemyselfdoingthat.i’dhavetosignsomething,wouldn’ti?”

sheturnedaroundwhensheaskedthat.

“hecoulddoithimself,”isaid.“thatis,hecouldhaveuptonow.”

theteatimerrangitsbell.sheturnedbacktothesinkandpouredtheteafromonepotintoanother.thensheputthefreshpotonthetrayshehadalreadyfixedupwithcups.iwentoverandgotthetrayandcarriedittothetablebetweenthetwodavenportsinthelivingroom.shesatdownoppositemeandpouredtwocups.ireachedformineandsetitdowninfrontofmeforittocool.iwatchedherfixherswithtwolumpsofsugarandthecream.shetastedit.

“whatdidyoumeanbythatlastremark?”sheaskedsuddenly.“thathecouldhaveuptonow—committedhimselftosomeinstitution,youmeant,didn’tyou?”

“iguessitwasawildpitch.didyouhidethegunitoldyouabout?youknow,themorningafterhemadethatplayupstairs.”

“hideit?”sherepeatedfrowning.“no.ineverdoanythinglikethat.idon’tbelieveinit.whyareyouasking?”

“andyouforgotyourhousekeystoday?”

“itoldyouidid.”

“butnotthegaragekey.usuallyinthiskindofhousetheoutsidekeysaremastered.”

“idon’tneedakeyforthegarage,”shesaidsharply.“itopensbyaswitch.there’sarelayswitchinsidethefrontdooryoupushupasyougoout.thenanotherswitchbesidethegarageoperatesthatdoor.oftenweleavethegarageopen.orcandygoesoutandclosesit.”