“shepulledonefaintalreadytonight.”

heshookhisheadslightly.“eileenneverfaints.”

“thenitwasaphony.”

hedidn’tlikethateither.

“whatdidyoumean—agoodmandiedforyou?”iasked.

hefrowned,thinkingaboutit.“justrubbish.itoldyouihadadream—”

“i’mtalkingaboutthatguffyoutypedout.”

helookedatmenow,turninghisheadonthepillowasifithadenormousweight.“anotherdream.”

“i’lltryagain.what’scandygotonyou?”

“shoveit,jack,”hesaid,andclosedhiseyes.

igotupandclosedthedoor.“youcan’trunforever,wade.candycouldbeablackmailer,sure.easy.hecouldevenbeniceaboutit—likeyouandliftyourdoughatthesametime.whatisit—awoman?”

“youbelievethatfool,loring,”hesaidwithhiseyesclosed.

“notexactly.whataboutthesister—theonethat’sdead?”

itwasawildpitchinasensebutithappenedtosplittheplate.hiseyessnappedwideopen.abubbleofsalivashowedonhislips.

“isthat—whyyou’rehere?”heaskedslowly,andinawhisperingvoice.

“youknowbetter.iwasinvited.youinvitedme.”

hisheadrolledbackandforthonthepillow.inspiteoftheseconalhewaseatenupbyhisnerves.hisfacewascoveredwithsweat.

“i’mnotthefirstlovinghusbandwhohasbeenanadulterer.leavemealone,damnyou.leavemealone.”

iwentintothebathroomandgotafacetowelandwipedhisfaceoff.igrinnedathimsneeringly.iwastheheeltoendallheels.waituntilthemanisdown,thenkickhimandkickhimagain.he’sweak.hecan’tresistorkickback.

“oneofthesedayswe’llgettogetheronit,”isaid.

“i’mnotcrazy,”hesaid.

“youjusthopeyou’renotcrazy.”

“i’vebeenlivinginhell.”

“ohsure.that’sobvious.theinterestingpointiswhy.here—takethis.”ihadanotherseconaloutofthenighttableandanotherglassofwater.hegotupononeelbowandgrabbedfortheglassandmisseditbyagoodfourinches.iputitinhishand.hemanagedtodrinkandswallowhispill.thenhelaybackflatanddeflated,hisfacedrainedofemotion.hisnosehadthatpinchedlook.hecouldalmosthavebeenadeadman.hewasn’tthrowinganybodydownanystairstonight.mostlikelynotanynight.

whenhiseyelidsgotheavyiwentoutoftheroom.theweightofthewebleywasagainstmyhip,draggingatmypocket.istartedbackdownstairsagain.eileen’sdoorwasopen.herroomwasdarkbuttherewasenoughlightfromthemoontoframeherstandingjustinsidethedoor.shecalledoutsomethingthatsoundedlikeaname,butitwasn’tmine.isteppedclosetoher.

“keepyourvoicedown,”isaid.“he’sgonebacktosleep.”

“ialwaysknewyouwouldcomeback,”shesaidsoftly.“evenaftertenyears.”

ipeeredather.oneofuswasgoofy.

“shutthedoor,”shesaidinthesamecaressingvoice.“alltheseyearsihavekeptmyselfforyou.”

iturnedandshutthedoor.itseemedlikeagoodideaatthemoment.whenifacedhershewasalreadyfallingtowardsme.soicaughther.idamnwellhadto.shepressedherselfhardagainstmeandherhairbrushedmyface.hermouthcameuptobekissed.shewastrembling.herlipsopenedandherteethopenedandhertonguedarted.thenherhandsdroppedandjerkedatsomethingandtherobeshewaswearingcameopenandunderneathitshewasasnakedasseptembermornbutadarnsightlesscoy.

“putmeonthebed,”shebreathed.

ididthat.puttingmyarmsaroundheritouchedbareskin,softskin,softyieldingflesh.iliftedherandcarriedherthefewstepstothebedandloweredher.shekeptherarmsaroundmyneck.shewasmakingsomekindofawhistlingnoiseinherthroat.thenshethrashedaboutandmoaned.thiswasmurder.iwasaseroticasastallion.iwaslosingcontrol.youdon’tgetthatsortofinvitationfromthatsortofwomanveryoftenanywhere.

candysavedme.therewasathinsqueakandiswungaroundtoseethedoorknobmoving.ijerkedlooseandjumpedforthedoor.igotitopenandbargedoutthroughitandthemexwastearingalongthehallanddownthestairs.halfwaydownhestoppedandturnedandleeredatme.thenhewasgone.

iwentbacktothedoorandshutit—fromtheoutsidethistime.somekindofweirdnoiseswerecomingfromthewomanonthebed,butthat’salltheywerenow.weirdnoises.thespellwasbroken.

iwentdownthestairsfastandcrossedintothestudyandgrabbedthebottleofscotchandtiltedit.whenicouldn’tswallowanymoreileanedagainstthewallandpantedandletthestuffburninmeuntilthefumesreachedmybrain.

itwasalongtimesincedinner.itwasalongtimesinceanythingthatwasnormal.thewhiskeyhitmehardandfastandikeptguzzlingituntiltheroomstartedtogethazyandthefurniturewasallinthewrongplacesandthelamplightwaslikewildfireorsummerlightning.theniwasflatoutontheleathercouch,tryingtobalancethebottleonmychest.itseemedtobeempty.itrolledawayandthumpedonthefloor.

thatwasthelastincidentofwhichitookanyprecisenotice.