igotupandwalkedaroundintheroom.itwasgoingtobeahotday.italreadywashot.iturnedtheblindsononeofthewindowstokeepthesunout.thenigaveittoherstraight.

“ilookedhimupinwho’swhoyesterdayafternoon.he’sforty-twoyearsold,yoursishisonlymarriage,nochildren.hispeoplearenewenglanders,hewenttoandoverandprinceton.hehasawarrecordandagoodone.hehaswrittentwelveofthesefatsex-and-swordplayhistoricalnovelsandeverydamnoneofthemhasbeenonthebest-sellerlists.hemusthavemadeplentyofthefolding.ifhehadfallenoutoflovewithhiswife,hesoundslikethetypewhowouldsaysoandgetaporce.ifhewasharingaroundwithanotherwoman,youwouldprobablyknowaboutit,andanywayhewouldn’thavetogetdrunkjusttoprovehefeltbad.ifyou’vebeenmarriedfiveyears,thenhewasthirty-sevenwhenthathappened.i’dsayheknewmostofwhatthereistoknowaboutwomenbythattime.isaymost,becausenobodyeverknowsallofit.”

istoppedandlookedatherandshesmiledatme.iwasn’thurtingherfeelings.iwenton.

“howardspencersuggested—onwhatgroundsihavenoidea—thatwhat’sthematterwithrogerwadeissomethingthathappenedalongtimeagobeforeyouweremarriedandthatithascaughtupwithhimnow,andishittinghimharderthanhecantake.spencerthoughtofblackmail.wouldyouknow?”

sheshookherheadslowly.“ifyoumeanwouldiknowifrogerhadbeenpayingoutalotofmoneytosomeone—no,iwouldn’tknowthat.idon’tmeddlewithhisbookkeepingaffairs.hecouldgiveawayalotofmoneywithoutmyknowingit.”

“okaythen.notknowingmr.wadeican’thavemuchideahowhewouldreacttohavingthebiteputonhim.ifhehasaviolenttemper,hemightbreaksomebody’sneck.ifthesecret,whateveritis,mightdamagehissocialorprofessionalstandingoreven,totakeanextremecase,madethelawboysdroparound,hemightpayoff—forawhileanyhow.butnoneofthisgetsusanywhere.youwanthimfound,you’reworried,you’remorethanworried.sohowdoigoaboutfindinghim?idon’twantyourmoney,mrs.wade.notnowanyway.”

shereachedintoherbagagainandcameupwithacoupleofpiecesofyellowpaper.theylookedlikesecondsheets,folded,andoneofthemlookedcrumpled.shesmoothedthemoutandhandedthemtome.

“oneifoundonhisdesk,”shesaid.“itwasverylate,orratherearlyinthemorning.iknewhehadbeendrinkingandiknewhehadn’tcomeupstairs.abouttwoo’clockiwentdowntoseeifhewasallright—orcomparativelyallright,passedoutonthefloororthecouchorsomething.hewasgone.theotherpaperwasinthewastebasketorrathercaughtontheedge,sothatithadn’tfallenin.”

ilookedatthefirstpiece,theonenotcrumpled.therewasashorttypewrittenparagraphonit,nomore.itread:“idonotcaretobeinlovewithmyselfandthereisnolongeranyoneelseformetobeinlovewith.signed:roger(f.scottfitzgerald)wade.p.s.thisiswhyineverfinishedthelasttycoon.”

“thatmeananythingtoyou,mrs.wade?”

“justattitudinizing.hehasalwaysbeenagreatadmirerofscottfitzgerald.hesaysfitzgeraldisthebestdrunkenwritersincecoleridge,whotookdope.noticethetyping,mr.marlowe.clear,even,andnomistakes.”

“idid.mostpeoplecan’tevenwritetheirnamesproperlywhensoused.”iopenedthecrumpledpaper.moretyping,alsowithoutanyerrorsorunevenness.thisoneread:“idonotlikeyou,dr.v.butrightnowyou’rethemanforme.”

shespokewhileiwasstilllookingatit.“ihavenoideawhodr.v.is.wedon’tknowanydoctorwithanamebeginningthatway.isupposeheistheonewhohasthatplacewhererogerwasthelasttime.”

“whenthecowpokebroughthimhome?yourhusbanddidn’tmentionanynamesatall—evenplacenames?”

sheshookherhead.“nothing.i’velookedinthedirectory.therearedozensofdoctorsofonesortoranotherwhosenamesbeginwithv.also,itmaynotbehissurname.”

“quitelikelyhe’snotevenadoctor,”isaid.“thatbringsupthequestionofreadycash.alegitimatemanwouldtakeacheck,butaquackwouldn’t.itmightturnintoevidence.andaguylikethatwouldn’tbecheap.roomandboardathishousewouldcomehigh.nottomentiontheneedle.”

shelookedpuzzled.“theneedle?”

“alltheshadyonesusedopeontheirclients.easiestwaytohandlethem.knockthemoutfortenortwelvehoursandwhentheycomeoutofit,they’regoodboys.butusingnarcoticswithoutalicensecangetyouroomandboardwithunclesam.andthatcomesveryhighindeed.”

“isee.rogerprobablywouldhaveseveralhundreddollars.healwayskeepsthatmuchinhisdesk.idon’tknowwhy.isupposeit’sjustawhim.there’snonetherenow.”

“okay,”isaid.“i’lltrytofinddr.v.idon’tknowjusthow,buti’lldomybest.takethecheckwithyou,mrs.wade.”

“butwhy?aren’tyouentitled—”

“lateron,thanks.andi’dratherhaveitfrommr.wade.he’snotgoingtolikewhatidoinanycase.”

“butifhe’ssickandhelpless—”

“hecouldhavecalledhisowndoctororaskedyouto.hedidn’t.thatmeanshedidn’twantto.”

sheputthecheckbackinherbagandstoodup.shelookedveryforlorn.“ourdoctorrefusedtotreathim,”shesaidbitterly.

“therearehundredsofdoctors,mrs.wade.anyoneofthemwouldhandlehimonce.mostofthemwouldstaywithhimforsometime,medicineisaprettycompetitiveaffairnowadays.”

“isee.ofcourseyoumustberight.”shewalkedslowlytothedoorandiwalkedwithher.iopenedit.

“youcouldhavecalledadoctoronyourown.whydidn’tyou?”

shefacedmesquarely.hereyeswerebright.theremighthavebeenahintoftearsinthem.alovelydishandnomistake.

“becauseilovemyhusband,mr.marlowe.i’ddoanythingintheworldtohelphim.butiknowwhatsortofmanheistoo.ificalledadoctoreverytimehetooktoomanydrinks,iwouldn’thaveahusbandverylong.youcan’ttreatagrownmanlikeachildwithasorethroat.”

“youcanifhe’sadrunk.oftenyoudamnwellhaveto.”

shewasstandingclosetome.ismelledherperfume.orthoughtidid.ithadn’tbeenputonwithaspraygun.perhapsitwasjustthesummerday.

“supposethereissomethingshamefulinhispast,”shesaid,draggingthewordsoutonebyoneasifeachofthemhadabittertaste.“evensomethingcriminal.itwouldmakenodifferencetome.buti’mnotgoingtobethemeansofitsbeingfoundout.”

“butit’sallrightifhowardspencerhiresmetofindout?”

shesmiledveryslowly.“doyoureallythinkiexpectedyoutogivehowardanyanswerbuttheoneyoudid—amanwhowenttojailratherthanbetrayafriend?”

“thanksfortheplug,butthatwasn’twhyigotjugged.”

shenoddedafteramomentofsilence,saidgoodbye,andstarteddowntheredwoodsteps.iwatchedhergetintohercar,aslimgrayjaguar,verynewlooking.shedroveituptotheendofthestreetandswungaroundintheturningcirclethere.herglovewavedatmeasshewentbydownthehill.thelittlecarwhiskedaroundthecornerandwasgone.

therewasaredoleanderbushagainstpartofthefrontwallofthehouse.iheardaflutterinitandababymockingbirdstartedcheepinganxiously.ispottedhimhangingontooneofthetopbranches,flappinghiswingsasifhewashavingtroublekeepinghisbalance.fromthecypresstreesatthecornerofthewalltherewasasingleharshwarningchirp.thecheepingstoppedatonceandthelittlefatbirdwassilent.

iwentinsideandshutthedoorandlefthimtohisflyinglesson.birdshavetolearntoo.