chaptertwo

iblinkupathim,suddenlyveryawakeaftermysleep,myeroticdream

forgotten.

“iwasonmyfront.imustha一veturnedoverinmysleep.”iwhisperweaklyin

mydefense.

hiseyesblazewithfury.hereachesdown,scoopsupmybikinitopfromhis

sunlounger,andtossesitatme.

“putthison!”hehisses.

“christian,nooneislooking.”

“trustme.they’relooking.i’msuretaylorandthesecuritycrewareenjoying

theshow!”hesnarls.

holyshit!whydoikeepforgettingaboutthem?igraspmybreastsinpanic,

hidingthem.eversincecharlietango’ssabotageddemiseweare

constantlyshadowedbydamnedsecurity.

“yes,”christiansnarls.“andsomesleazyfuckingpaparazzicouldgetashot

ofyou,too.doyouwanttobealloverthecoverofstarmagazine?naked

thistime?”

shit!thepaparazzi!fuck!asihurriedlyscrambleintomytop,allfingersand

thumbs,thecolordrainsfrommyface.ishudder.theunpleasantmemoryof

beingbesiegedbythepaparazzioutsidesip

afterourengagementwasleakedcomesunwelcometomind—allpartofthe

christiangreypackage.

“l’addition!”christiansnapsatthepassingwaitress.“we’regoing,”hesays

tome.

“now?”

“yes.now.”

ohshit,he’snottobearguedwith.

hepullsonhisshorts,eventhoughhistrunksaredrippingwet,thenhisgray

t-shirt.thewaitressisbackinamomentwithhiscreditcardandthecheck.

reluctantly,iwriggleintomyturquoisesundressandstepintomyflip-flops.

oncethewaitresshasleft,christiansnatchesuphisbook

22|page

eljames

andblackberryandmaskshisfurybehindmirroreda一viatorglasses.he’s

bristlingwithtensionandanger.myheartsinks.everyotherwomanonthe

beachistopless—it’snotthatbigofacrime.infactilookoddwithmytop

on.isighinwardly,myspiritssinking.ithoughtchristianwouldseethefunny

side...sortof...maybeifi’dstayedonmyfront,buthissenseofhumor

hasevaporated.

“pleasedon’tbemadatme,”iwhisper,takinghisbookandblackberryfrom

himandplacingtheminmybackpack.

“toolateforthat,”hesaysquietly—tooquietly.“come.”takingmyhand,he

signalsuptotaylorandhistwosidekicks,thefrenchsecurityofficers

philippeandgaston.weirdly,theyareidenticaltwins.theyha一vebeen

patientlywatchingusandeveryoneelseonthebeachfromtheverandah.

whydoikeepforgettingaboutthem?how?taylorisstony-facedbehindhis

darkglasses.shit,he’smadatme,too.i’mstillnotusedtoseeinghimso

casuallydressedinshortsandablackpoloshirt.

christianleadsmeintothehotel,throughthelobby,andoutontothestreet.

heremainssilent,brooding,andbad-tempered,andit’sallmyfault.taylor

andhisteamshadowus.

“wherearewegoing?”iasktentatively,gazingupathim.

“backtotheboat.”hedoesn’tlookatme.

iha一venoideaofthetime.ithinkitmustbeaboutfiveorsixintheafternoon.

whenwereachthequayside,christianleadsmeontothedockwherethe

motorboatandjetskibelongingtothefairladyaremoored.aschristian

untiesthejetski,ihandmybackpacktotaylor.iglancenervouslyupathim,

butlikechristian,hisexpressiongivesnothingaway.iflush,thinkingabout

whathe’sseenonthebeach.

“hereyougo,mrs.grey.”taylorpassesmealifevestfromthemotorboat,

andidutifullyputiton.whyamitheonlyonewhohastowearalifejacket?

christianandtaylorexchangesomekindoflook.jeez,isheangrywith

taylor,too?christianthenchecksthestrapsonmylifejacket,cinchingthe

middleonetightly.

“you’lldo,”hemutterssullenly,stillnotturningtolookatme.shit.heclimbs

gracefullyontothejetskiandholdsouthishandformetojoinhim.

graspingittightly,imanagetothrowmylegovertheseatbehindhimwithout

fallingintothewater,whiletaylorandthetwins

23|page

fiftyshadesfreed

clamberintothemotorboat.christiankicksthejetskiawayfromthequay,

anditfloatsgentlyintothemarina.

“holdon,”heorders,andiputmyarmsaroundhim.thisismyfa一voritepartof

tra一velingbyjetski.ihughimclosely,mynosenuzzlingintohisback,

marvelingthattherewasatimewhenhewouldnotha一vetoleratedme

touchinghimthisway.hesmellsgood...ofchristianandthesea.forgive

me,christian,please?

hestiffens.“steady,”hesays,histonesofter.ikisshisbackandrestmy

cheekagainsthim,lookingbacktowardthequaywhereafewholidaymakers

ha一vegatheredtowatchtheshow.

christianturnsthekeyandthemotorroarstolife.withonetwistofthe

accelerator,thejetskibucksforwardandspeedsacrossthecooldark

water,throughthemarinaandouttothecenteroftheharbortowardthefair

lady.iholdhimtighter.ilovethis—it’ssoexciting.everymusclein

christian’sleanframeisevidentasiclingtohim.taylorpullsalongsidein

themotorboat.christianglancesathimthenacceleratesagain,andwe

shootforward,whippingoverthetopofthewaterlikeanexpertlytossed

pebble.taylorshakeshisheadinresignedexasperationandheadsstraight

totheyacht,whilechristianshootspastthefairladyandheadsouttoward

theopensea.theseasprayissplashingus,thewarmwindbuffetingmy

faceandflayingmyponytailcrazilyaroundme.thisissomuchfun.maybe

thethrillofthisridewilldispelchristian’sbadmood.ican’tseehisface,buti

knowhe’senjoyinghimself—carefree,actinghisageforachange.

hesteersinahugesemicircleandistudytheshoreline—theboatsinthe

marina,themosaicofyellow,whiteandsand-coloredofficesand

apartments,andthecraggymountainsbehind.itlookssodisorganized—not

theregimentedblocksthatiamusedto—butsopicturesque.christian

glancesoverhisshoulderatme,andthere’stheghostofasmileplayingon

hislips.

“again?”heshoutsoverthenoiseoftheengine.

inodenthusiastically.hisansweringgrinisdazzling,andheopensthe

throttleandspeedsaroundthefairladyandonouttoseaoncemore...

andithinki’mforgiven.

24|page

eljames

“you’vecaughtthesun,”christiansaysmildlyasheundoesmylifevest.i

anxiouslytrytoassesshismood.weareondeckaboardtheyacht,andone

ofthestewardsisstandingquietlynearby,waitingformylifevest.christian

passesittohim.

“willthatbeall,sir?”theyoungmanasks.ilovehisfrenchaccent.christian

glancesatme,takesoffhisshades,andslipsthemintothecollarofhistshirt,

lettingthemhang.

“wouldyoulikeadrink?”heasksme.

“doineedone?”

hecockshisheadtooneside.

“whywouldyousaythat?”hisvoiceissoft.

“youknowwhy.”

hefrownsasifweighingsomethingupinhismind.oh,whatishethinking?

“twoginandtonics,please.andsomenutsandolives,”hesaystothe

steward,whonodsandquicklyvanishes.

“youthinki’mgoingtopunishyou?”christian’svoiceissilky.

“doyouwantto?”

“yes.”

“how?”

“i’llthinkofsomething.maybewhenyou’vehadyourdrink.”andit’sasensual

threat.iswallow,andmyinnergoddessblinksupfromhersunloungerwhere

she’stryingtocatchrayswithasilverreflectorfannedoutatherneck.

christian’sfrownsoncemore.

“youwanttobe?”

“youwanttobe?”

howdoesheknow?

“depends,”imutter,flushing.

“onwhat?”hehideshissmile.

“ifyouwanttohurtmeornot.”

hismouthpressesintoahardline,humorforgotten.heleansforwardand

kissesmyforehead.

“anastasia,you’remywife,notmysub.idon’teverwanttohurtyou.you

shouldknowthatbynow.just...justdon’ttakeyourclothesoffinpublic.i

don’twantyounakedalloverthetabloids.youdon’twantthat,andi’msure

yourmomandraydon’twantthateither.”

25|page

fiftyshadesfreed

oh!ray.holyshit,he’dha一veacoronary.whatwasithinking?imentally

castigatemyself.

thestewardappearswithourdrinksandsnacksandplacesthemonthe

teaktable.

“sit,”christiancommands.idoashesaysandsettleintoadirector’schair.

christiantakesaseatbesidemeandpassesmeaginandtonic.

“cheers,mrs.grey.”

“cheers,mr.grey.”

itakeawelcomesip.it’sthirst-quenching,cold,anddelicious.whenigaze

athim,he’swatchingmecarefully,hismoodunreadable.it’sveryfrustrating.

..idon’tknowifhe’sstillmadatme.ideploymypatenteddistraction

technique.

“whoownsthisboat?”iask.

“abritishknight.sirsomebody-or-other.hisgreat-grandfatherstarteda

grocerystore.hisdaughter’smarriedtooneofthecrownprincesof

europe.”

oh.“super-rich?”

christianlookssuddenlywary.“yes.”

“likeyou,”imurmur.

“yes.”

oh.

“andlikeyou,”christianwhispersandpopsanoliveintohismouth.iblink

rapidly...avisionofhiminhistuxandsilverwaistcoatcomestomind...

hiseyesburningwithsincerityashegazesdownatmeduringourwedding

ceremony.

“allthatismineisnowyours,”hesays,hisvoiceringingoutclearlyreciting

hisvowsfrommemory.

allmine?holycow.

“it’sodd.goingfromnothingto”—iwa一vemyhandtoindicateouropulent

surroundings—“toeverything.”

“you’llgetusedtoit.”

“idon’tthinki’llevergetusedtoit.”

taylorappearsondeck.“sir,youha一veacall.”christianfrownsbuttakesthe

profferedblackberry.

“grey,”hesnapsandrisesfromhisseattostandatthebowoftheyacht.

26|page

eljames

igazeoutatthesea,tuningouthisconversationwithros—ithink—his

numbertwo.iamrich...stinkingrich.iha一vedonenothingtoearnthismoney

...justmarriedarichman.ishudderasmyminddriftsbacktoour

conversationaboutprenups.itwassundayafterhisbirthdayandwewere

seatedatthekitchentableenjoyingaleisurelybreakfast...allofus,elliot,

kate,grace,andiweredebatingthemeritsofbaconversussausage,while

carrickandchristianreadthesundaypaper...

~o0o~

“lookatthis,”squealsmiaasshesetshernetbookonthetablebeforeuson

thekitchentable.“there’sagossipyitemontheseattlenoozwebsiteabout

youbeingengaged,christian.”

“already?”gracesaysinsurprise.thenhermouthpursesassome

obviouslyunpleasantthoughtcrosseshermind.christianfrowns.miareads

thecolumnoutloud.“wordhasreachedushereatthenoozthatseattle’s

mosteligiblebachelor,thechristiangrey,hasfinallybeensnappedupand

weddingbellsareintheair.butwhoisthelucky,luckylady?thenoozison

thehunt.betshe’sreadingonehelluvaprenup.”

miagigglesthenstopsabruptlyaschristianglaresather.silencedescends,

andtheatmosphereinthegreykitchenplungestobelowzero.

ohno!aprenup?thethoughthasnevercrossedmymind.iswallow,feeling

alltheblooddrainfrommyface.pleaseground,swallowmeupnow!

christianshiftsuncomfortablyinhischairasiglanceapprehensivelyathim.

christianshiftsuncomfortablyinhischairasiglanceapprehensivelyathim.

“no,”hemouthsatme.

“christian,”carricksaysgently.

“i’mnotdiscussingthisagain,”christiansnapsatcarrickwhoglancesatme

nervouslyandopenshismouthtosaysomething.

“noprenup!”christianalmostshoutsathimandbroodinglygoesbackto

readinghispaper,ignoringeveryoneelseatthetable.theylookalternately

atmethenhim...thenanywherebutatthetwoofus.

27|page

fiftyshadesfreed

“christian,”imurmur.“i’llsignanythingyouandmr.greywant.”

jeez,itwouldn’tbethefirsttimehe’smademesignsomething.christian

looksupandglaresatme.

“no!”hesnaps.iblanchoncemore.

“it’stoprotectyou.”

“christian,ana—ithinkyoushoulddiscussthisinprivate,”grace

admonishesus.sheglaresatcarrickandmia.ohdear,lookslikethey’rein

trouble,too.

“ana,thisisnotaboutyou,”carrickmurmursreassuringly.“andpleasecall

mecarrick.”

christiannarrowscoldeyesathisfatherandmyheartsinks.hell...he’s

reallymad.

everyoneeruptsintoanimatedconversation,andmiaandkateleapupto

clearthetable.

“idefinitelyprefersausage,”exclaimselliot.

istaredownatmyknottedfingers.crap.ihopemr.andmrs.greydon’tthink

i’msomekindofgolddigger.christianreachesoverandgraspsbothmy

handsgentlyinoneofhis.

“stopit.”

howdoesheknowwhati’mthinking?

“ignoremydad,”christiansayssoonlyicanhearhim.“he’sreallypissed

aboutelena.thatstuffwasallaimedatme.iwishmymomhadkepther

mouthshut.”

iknowchristianisstillsmartingfromhis“talk”withcarrickaboutelenalast

night.

“hehasapoint,christian.you’reverywealthy,andi’mbringingnothingto

ourmarriagebutmystudentloans.”

christiangazesatme,hiseyesbleak.“anastasia,ifyoulea一veme,youmight

aswelltakeeverything.youleftmeoncebefore.iknowhowthatfeels.”

holyfuck!“thatwasdifferent,”iwhisper,movedbyhisintensity.

“but...youmightwanttolea一veme.”thethoughtmakesmesick.

hesnortsandshakeshisheadwithmockdisgust.

“christian,youknow,imightdosomethingexceptionallystupid—

andyou...”iglancedownatmyknottedhands,painlancingthroughme

unabletofinishmysentence.losingchristian...fuck.

28|page

eljames

“stop.stopnow.thissubjectisclosed,ana.we’renotdiscussingitany

more.noprenup.notnow—notever.”hegivesmeapointedgive-it-up-now

look,whichsilencesme.thenheturnstograce.

“mom,”hesays.“canweha一vetheweddinghere?”

~o0o~

andhe’snotmentioneditagain.infactateveryopportunityhe’striedto

reassuremeabouthiswealth...that’sitmine,too.ishudderasirecallthe

crazyshoppingfestchristiandemandedigoonwithcarolineacton—the

personalshopperfromniemans—inpreparationforthishoneymoon.my

bikinialonecostfivehundredandfortydollars.imean,it’snice,butreally—

that’saridiculousamountofmoneyforfourtriangularscrapsofmaterial.

“youwillgetusedtoit,”christianinterruptsmyreverieasheresumeshis

placeatthetable.

“usedtoit?”

“themoney,”hesaysrollinghiseyes.

oh,fifty,maybewithtime.ipushthesmalldishofsaltedalmondsand

cashewstowardhim.

“yournuts,sir,”isaywithasstraightafaceasicanmanage,tryingtobring

somehumortoourconversationaftermydarkthoughtsandmybikinitop

fauxpas.

hesmirks.“i’mnutsaboutyou.”hetakesanalmond,hiseyessparklingwith